INTIMACY ANOREXIA®
A significant percentage of sexual addicts and their partners are also intimacy anorexics.
Although the idea of Intimacy Anorexia® is new to most people, the problem is widespread, and the symptoms are easily recognizable if your coach has been trained on what to look for. The term, registered by Dr. Doug Weiss, Ph. D., refers to a situation in which one spouse/partner is actively and purposely withholding themselves emotionally, spiritually, and/or sexually from the other for the purpose of creating distance. Intimacy anorexia® is classified as a relationship disorder, as opposed to a psychological disorder, that most often shows up only in the marriage or primary relationship of the intimacy anorexic. A significant percentage of sexual addicts and their partners are also intimacy anorexics. Intimacy Anorexia® is considered to be an addiction to withholding.
SIGNS OF INTIMACY ANOREXIA®
It’s important that you and your partner seek the advice of a trained professional if Intimacy Anorexia® is suspected. However, here are some signs and symptoms to look for
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  • Stays so busy with work, projects, etc. that they have little time to spend with their partner
  • When issues/arguments come up, the person's first response is to put the blame back on their partner
  • Refrains from showing love to their partner in ways they know the partner needs or appreciates
  • Refuses to praise or compliment the partner
  • Withholds sex from their partner and/or is not emotionally present during sex
  • Refuses to attend church or participate in other spiritually-focused events with their partner, even though they are a spiritual person
  • Is unwilling/unable to share true feelings with their partner
  • Uses anger, disapproval, and/or silence in an attempt to control or punish their partner
  • Has ongoing or ungrounded criticism of their partner and verbalizes it regularly
  • Controls and/or shames their partner around money or has a double standard toward the partner when it comes to spending money, for example they can spend what they want, but partner has to account for every penny or is on an allowance.
  • A sexless Marriage.  Approximately 15% to 20% of couples are in sexless marriages- meaning they do not engage in any sexual activities with their partner. Although a sexless marriage does not always signify marital instability or unhappiness, it can be a symptom of living with an intimacy anorexic.
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